CHRIST-mas!

Last night I was stuck behind a troglodyte with three brand new bumper stickers affixed to the rear window of his terrorist-funding, behemoth of a land-ship car:

• Whatever happened to Merry Christmas?

• [image of a caucasoid Christ] RELEVANT

• Christmas is not a holiday: it is a HOLY DAY!

Thankfully it's nearly past that time of year for the wingnuts to scream about the war against Christmas/Christians, but as a late shout out to them I feel like commenting.

Christians, YOU ARE NOT OPPRESSED!

Quite the opposite. When certain Christians out there (how I'd like to believe they are not, nor do they represent, the majority of believers) declare that America is a Christian nation, there is no mistake that the subtext is that while other religions may be tolerated, they are neither American (or 'Mercun, if you prefer), nor are they entirely welcome. The sense I get out of the "Save Christmas" campaigners/crusaders is the same: this time of year in America is not for Hanukkah or Kwanzaa or Rohatsu. It is about the (putative) birth of The Christ.¹ And go to Hell if you disagree!²

I don't know that atheists should be considered as citizens, nor should they be considered patriots. This is one nation under God.

— George H.W. Bush, 1991

I'll admit to the reality that America is a nation of predominantly Christian citizens (79.8% of Americans self-identified as Christians in 2001 -- an 8.5% decline since 1990), but that doesn't mean that as a result, the nation ought to necessarily devolve into a Christian theocracy or even give preference to Christianity. Participation and membership in this society is and ought to continue to be completely unrelated to religious affiliation or lack thereof.

The idea that stores and municipalities are succumbing to some secularist conspiracy given the statistic above is absurd! Retail establishments are engaging in religio-neutral holiday speech because they want to make sure that they can get not just 79.8% of people in their stores, but 100%. It's a plot to convince we non-Christians that it's still okay to buy buy BUY. At their worst, commercial interests exploit the holiday in an attempt to cynically manipulate Christian observances for the sake of maximizing profit (which is offensive to me, but ought to be just fine the the O'Reilly contingent).

If anyone is being oppressed it is non-Christians (atheists, Jews, etc.) who are made to feel guilty for not spending a small fortune on their friends and family at the end of every year. I enjoy buying presents for people I love, but not when it is forced on me.

I don't know how to say this any more clearly: in a non-commercial milieu (e.g., the town square, a city holiday pageant), non-sectarian prayers, religio-neutral holiday greetings, and diversity of holiday displays are not part of an orchestrated offensive against your religion. They are efforts to ensure that the rest of us are not excluded, marginalized, diminished, dismissed, and/or suppressed in the context of American society by a sanctimonious few.³

So, if someone wants to say "Merry Christmas," they can have at it. Personally, I think it's nice one might want to share the good tidings of the season. But when people get all bent out of shape when I reply with a "Happy Holidays" or my sister suggests to have a Joyous Yule I start feeling defensive. We just want to be let in to play with our own toys and not to have to memorize some secret handshake as an alternative to being acosted.

So, since today is X-mas Eve, I just wanted to say Happy Holidays.



I am mindful that I feel: hungover
On the iPod: Brooker Ervin - The Trance





¹ Not just any Christ, but the Deity Formerly Known as Jesus of Nazareth.
² In this instance, I would also presume that the speaker intends for the literal result, and is not just speaking dismissively.
³Seriously, when did this become a radically untenable proposition? I know that the Conservative Christian Right believes that separation of church and state is an issue still up for debate, but people of faith came to this country over two centuries ago to escape monocratic state-sanctioned religious bigotry and persecution. I'm not inclined to forget this inconvenint fact.